Allow me to be frank at the commencement. You will not like me. The ladies will be envious and the gentlemen will be repelled. You will not like me now and you will like me a good deal less as we go on. Ladies, an announcement: I am up for it, all the time. That is not a boast or an opinion, it is bone hard medical fact. I put it round you know. And you will watch me putting it round and sigh for it. Don't." It is a deal of trouble for you and you are better off watching and drawing your conclusions from a distance than you would be if I got my hands up your petticoats. Gentlemen. Do not despair, I am up for that as well. And the same warning applies. Still your cheesy erections till I have had my say. But later when you shag - and later you will shag, I shall expect it of you and I will know if you have let me down - I wish you to shag with my homuncular image rattling in your gonads. Feel how it was for me, how it is for me and ponder. 'Was that shudder the same shudder she sensed? Did she know something more profound? Or is there some wall of wretchedness that we all batter with our heads at that shining , livelong moment.' That is it. That is my prologue, nothing in rhyme, no protestations of modesty, you were not expecting that I hope. I am Sarah-Louise Johnson and I do not want you to like me.
22, Pansexual, polyamorous. London UK
Beards and body hair
I had this problem I hated my wedding dress and I hated it on the day I still hate it now. My mum chose it and ruined the one thing that was meant to make me happy if it doesn’t make you happy on the day alter it maybe add a few accessories!
But you looked so beautiful! and the little dress you changed to at the reception was so you.
But yeah, I just don’t want to look back at pictures in years to come and think “I looked terrible”
I have some back-up plans in place though so I’m trying not to worry about it. I’m going for a fitting next monday as well so hopefully the incredibly talented lady I’ve found can fix all the problems :)